An interview with a domestic abuse survivor:

This interview was conducted with Katia, a woman who endured domestic violence and is a recent survivor. Despite her difficulties she came out stronger than before. Here are some wise words from her to not only encourage women in similar situations but to also inspire them to reclaim their strength, seek the support they need, and believe in their own resilience. Katia’s journey serves as a powerful reminder that even in the face of adversity, it’s possible to emerge stronger and more empowered than ever before. Her story also calls on those who haven’t experienced such challenges to step up, support survivors by donating, advocating, and raising awareness, thus playing a crucial role in creating a more supportive and compassionate community for everyone.

(For safety reasons, we cannot provide this woman’s full name. Thank you for understanding.)

“Have you experienced any social neglect during our situation and what was that like? How do you feel this may play a factor in fear of reporting domestic issues?”

“I remember when I reported a violation to law enforcement, the officer who took the report told me, “well that’s your husband; you married him.” Looking back on this I realized that had I not been strong mentally, that incident would have deterred me from reporting any further. It can be very discouraging when dealing with law enforcement officers who don’t believe you or victim-blame. I think there needs to be more training for law enforcement officers to be more compassionate in these situations.”

“What was the hardest part for you when you realized it was an unhealthy relationship?”

“The hardest part for me was that I knew it wasn’t going to be easy to get away. I also felt terrible knowing that the person my daughter considered her dad would no longer be. I knew he would, in a way, haunt me for a long time, and to this day, he still does. He continuously bashes me online to the point where other people have propositioned me to find a dark alley and for them to “kick my ass.” He also cut me off financially in every way possible. He turned off the utilities at our home, my phone services, internet service, and various other things. That was his way of controlling me, and I believe his way of trying to get me back to him so he could continue his controlling, manipulative, abusive ways.”

“Do you feel there may be social norms that prevent women from safely leaving these situations?”

“I believe that in certain situations, family members can enable abusive behavior and make it difficult for the victim to report the abuse by making them feel guilty. There’s definitely a stigma associated with being a victim of domestic violence, which causes many women to refrain from reporting the abuse. Many people question why women didn’t leave the abusive situation earlier or why they stayed for so long. Still, only those who have experienced it genuinely understand how challenging it is to go.”

“If you were to give advice to all women survivors or not, what might that be?”

“For women who are in abusive situations, they must understand that they do not deserve the abuse. The sooner they leave, cut off contact, and break the trauma bond, the better. Each time they choose to stay, it becomes that much harder to go the next time. No woman deserves any form of abuse. It’s not easy, and things can get messy, but regaining control of your life and confidence is incredibly beautiful.”